In Another Light

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Summary: “No one else knows this Kasey, and I feel like the most special person in the world that he shares this side of himself with me.”

AUTHOR: Catw00man
EMAIL: catw00man@cryptoffic.com
RATING: R
CHARACTER: Tony Stewart/Kasey Kahne, Tony POV
CATEGORY: Romance/Smut
COMPLETED: December 12, 2004
WORD COUNT: 2,078
DISCLAIMER: I own NOTHING and am affiliated with NO ONE mentioned here. Not the drivers, not the teams, no one. This is all fiction and fun. In other words...NOT REAL, NOT REAL, NOT REAL. ;-)
DEDICATION: To Heather who begged for this and wrote me the beautiful fic “Magic.”
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Honestly this is not my normal characters or pairing, but I wrote this as a favor to a friend after the 2004 banquet. I don’t know that it’s my best fic, but it was an idea I had to get out of my head nevertheless. This is most likely a one shot deal, so feel free to let me know what you think. Enjoy! ;-)
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Waldorf-Astoria Hotel room: December 3, 2004

I lean back against the dark hardwood of the headboard and reach over to the nightstand, picking up the half full glass of champagne by the long delicate stem. I twirl the glass between my fingers, watching the way the bubbles dance and shimmer in the soft moonlight, streaming through the balcony windows and smile. It’s been a good night. A very good night. And I’ve had good nights in New York…but this beats them all.

I spin the glass between my fingers again, smiling at the remembered celebration it signifies--a celebration even better than the one two years ago. But that’s not a surprise. Not really. I’ve finally come to realize that there is more to life than winning, more to life than being the best, and it’s all because of one person.

I feel the same smile I’ve worn all night long cross my face again as I think about the night. As I remember him dragging his feet as he made his way up to that stage, to stand in front of the world. His speech was far from being the most eloquent, the most polished…but if people actually knew what it took for him to even be standing there, they would be as proud of him as I am.

I remember the terrified look in his eyes, when he finally realized he had won rookie of the year and would have to make a speech in front of us all. I really don’t even think he enjoyed clinching the award, knowing what it would entail. But he did it. Just like I told him he could. And so what if it wasn’t the smoothest speech of the evening? If I remember right, even Gordon fell apart the first time he had to make the “big speech.”

I look over to the sliding glass door, between the parted curtains, and see the sparkling city lights and remember how his eyes sparkled, as they briefly found mine in the crowd and he thanked me for being there for him. As if he even had to. But he did, and I wonder if he had any idea what it meant to me. I knew how much he didn’t want to be up there, and the fact that he stayed, once his speech was finally done, to mention me…

I slowly shake my head with a smile, as I set the long-stemmed glass back on the bedside table. He did good. Just like I knew he would. And as he made his way back to his table, shooting me a glance along the way, I wonder if anyone else noticed how his hand didn’t shake when he reached for his glass. He’s not the same person he was at the beginning of the year, even if he doesn’t realize it. I just like to think that maybe I’m a part of that.

I like to think that somehow, someway I’ve helped him become a better person, because I sure as hell know he has me. He’s changed me in more ways than I can count, reaching me in ways no one else ever could. I laugh softly, as I think, who would have known all it would take to quell my raging anger and impulsiveness was one sweet boy from nowheresville Washington? All the shrinks in the world couldn’t do what he has so easily.

I turn my head and look at the angel sleeping beside me, long curls a tangled mess, as he hugs the pillow his head is resting on. I take in the long dark lashes against his still slightly flushed cheeks, and listen to his soft breathing through barely parted lips. I can’t help but reach over and trace the back of my hand along the side of his face, and I feel the complete and total calm that comes over me only when I’m with him.

He has done what no one else on this earth ever has. He’s tamed me--absolutely and completely--and I adore him for it. He’s given me a peace and a home, with only his presence, and I don’t know how I ever survived before. I can’t even remember, can’t even imagine what life was like before him anymore. He has become my world, in the space of only a year…and I only hope I’ve been able to make him understand.

I shift down on the bed, turning away from the window and lay down on my side to face him. I prop myself up on my elbow, resting my head in my hand as I watch him sleep. Then I smile again, as I remember the way he looked at me, when I finally took my turn on the stage.

His eyes were riveted to me, and for a moment, I had to catch my breath, as I could see all his emotions swimming in his eyes. He was staring up at me, as if I was the only person in the world, and all I could think was how I didn’t deserve his adoration. But I pushed on, delivering my speech with practiced ease, until I finally came to the part about him. That was when I met those beautiful eyes again as I congratulated him and called him a “friend.” As if that one word could even begin to describe him. But as my eyes locked with his, I knew in an instant he understood, he knew everything I wanted to say and never could.

The rest of the night honestly seemed like a blur as driver after driver took the stage, making sure to kiss all the required amounts of ass, but I saw none of it. I barely even noticed when Gordon showed up to rescue his crew chief from delivering his speech, lost as I was in the sweet boy in front of me.

I reach out to take one long curl, resting against his forehead, between my fingers, letting the soft lock slide against my skin before pulling my hand away. It seemed like forever before we were finally able to get away from the crowd and make our way up here, where I had champagne waiting to celebrate his rookie of the year honors. But as I expected, there wasn’t much time for the bubbly alcohol--not when we had each other.

I smile again as I remember how bold and eager he was as he undressed me tonight--so very different from the way things used to be. But if there is one thing he knows, it’s that I’m his, totally and completely. When he’s with me, like he was tonight, there is no trace of the shy, timid rookie the world sees. Not anymore. No, he’s finally confident in us, just like I always hoped he would be, and it is a magnificent sight…and one, at least for now, is all mine.

But I know it won’t be long before that confidence and self-assurance spills over into the rest of his life, and he will charm the world just like he does me. Part of me can’t wait to see that, while the rest of me wishes I could keep that part of him all to myself. But I won’t, I know. I’ll do exactly what I have all year, encouraging him and standing by his side…just like I always will.

I watch him as he unconsciously licks his lips in his sleep and have to force myself from waking him, as images from a short time ago run through my head. Flashes of memory as he presses his soft lips to mine and murmurs my name against my skin. Rememberings of long fingers running through my hair and over my skin as clothing so easily disappears. Feelings of skin against skin as we crashed to the bed, lost to the world, seeing nothing but each other. Finally I can’t help myself, and I reach out again tracing my fingertips across his cheek and lightly down his face.

“Tony…”

My name is a whisper on his lips, as he murmurs it even before he fully wakes, and I feel my heart squeeze with emotion that the first thing he thinks of is me. I smile, as still sleepy blue eyes finally open to meet mine, and a broad smile crosses his face as he looks at me. His eyes are sparkling again, as he unwraps his arms from around the pillow and slides closer to me, slipping his arms around my waist as he nuzzles my neck.

“Mmm, you’re still awake,” he says low in my ear and I feel my skin tingle as I feel his breath against my neck.

“Yeah,” I breathe against his skin, as he presses up against me, and I feel as if an electric current runs through my body at his touch. How is it that he can always drive me out of my mind in only seconds?

“Tonight was perfect,” he says quietly as he rubs his smooth cheek against mine before finally pulling back just enough to meet my eyes. “Thank you, Tony,” and as I look into his beautiful eyes, shining with love and devotion, I know instantly his words are for much more than tonight.

“Kasey,” his name, a worshipful prayer on my lips. I want to find the words to let him know all the emotions in my heart, but as I stare into his sparkling eyes full of love, I’m speechless. Instead I reach forward, taking his face in my hands and lean into him, pressing my lips to his in a tender kiss. I lose myself to the touch and feel of him against me before finally pulling away to meet his intense gaze again, and finally the words come. “I love you, Kasey,” I say as I trail my hand down his face again.

I watch as a broad smile spreads across his face at my words, and I’m reminded of the sunlight, breaking through the clouds, when he looks at me that way, and I will do anything to keep that smile on his face. “I love you too, Tony,” he says with a grin as he leans toward me, meeting my lips with his again.

I feel his tongue sweep across my bottom lip, and I melt into him, as he then slips his tongue past my lips to tangle with mine in a long slow kiss. He gently pushes me on to my back, never breaking the kiss, and I take him into my arms as he presses against me again. I feel his hands slide down my body, leaving a trail of fire in their wake, and I pull him closer as he slides his body over mine, and I’m completely blanketed in him.

Finally he breaks the kiss and looks down on me, propping himself up with hands on either side of my head, as he stares into my eyes again. I loose myself to the intensity of his eyes and watch breathless, as they seem to darken, and a slow smile crosses his lips. I can’t help but match his grin with one of my own as I know that look all too well. I feel anticipation start to build in the pit of my stomach, as he slowly licks his lips never tearing his eyes from mine.

The thought, “When did he become such a vixen?” runs through my head as he looks down on me. I can’t do anything but marvel at him when he looks at me this way, so different from how the rest of the world sees him…and it’s all for me. No one else knows this Kasey, and I feel like the most special person in the world that he shares this side of himself with me. But as he grinds his hips against mine, without breaking eye contact with me, all thoughts but the touch and feel of him leave my mind.

“I love you, Kasey,” I tell him once more as he leans down to trail kisses along my neck and I let myself be completely lost in him. He is my angel. He is my world. He is my everything, all that I never knew I needed and more, and I know beyond a shadow of a doubt I can do anything as long as I have him by my side.

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Catw00man - catw00man@cryptoffic.com