Victory Bear Lane

Home : Stories by Catw00man : Bear on the Wall : Victory Bear Lane

Summary: Rescue me. Please!

AUTHOR: Catw00man
EMAIL: catw00man@cryptoffic.com
RATING: PG
SERIES: Bear on the Wall: Conversations from the Garage and Beyond
CHARACTER: Tony Stewart, Denny Hamlin, Todd Berrier, DeLana Harvick, Kevin Harvick, Kevvie!Bear POV
PROMPT: Taming the Muse #141 (#116 for me) - Cadence
COMPLETED: April 18, 2009
WORD COUNT: 1,022
DISCLAIMER: I own NOTHING and am affiliated with NO ONE mentioned here. Not the drivers, not the teams, no one. This is all fiction and fun. In other words...NOT REAL, NOT REAL, NOT REAL. ;-)
AUTHOR'S NOTE: If you’re enjoying this series you really need to check out Zippit’s K.D. Harvey Show. I’ve been betaing it and I swear I laughed so hard I almost cried. ;)
AUTHOR'S NOTE2: This takes place during Kevin’s annual “Spring Fling” race at his go-cart track, Hee Haw Speedway.  This is has been known to turn into a big grudge match as the winner takes home the trophy until the next time.  Tony Stewart won it last time so he’s returning with the trophy.  Also, as far as the race results go, according to the real Mr. Harvick this is how it happened. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spring Fling at Hee Haw Speedway – Kernersville, NC – March 26th, 2009

This.  Is all.  Wrong.

And not just because I’m thrown on my side and surrounded by smelly cans.  The big Bear Man said I was going to be a surprise, but he doesn’t understand.  Green Eyes needs me.  Big Yellow needs me.  They aren’t supposed to race without me.  Green Eyes said so.  But the Bear Man said he has to win me back.  Then he smooshed me in all these cans and called me a prize.

Green Eyes, save me!  I don’t wanna be a prize.

“Hey Smoke, did you do something to the trophy?”

“What’re you talkin’ about, Hamlin?  Like you’d even know if I did.”

“I’ve seen pictures, and it looks…different.”

“Don’t worry about it, Denny.  Not like you’ll be taking it home anyway.”

“You can have the beer can trophy.  It’s Eldora I’m after.  Who even drinks Schiltz anymore anyway?”

“Watch it, Hamlin….”

“Did you add some extra cans on here?”

Take it home?  Do you mean take me home?  My home is with Green Eyes!  Someone, anyone, get me out of heeeeeeeeeere!  It’s dark in here and it smells bad!  I can’t see anything.  I don’t wanna be trophy anymore.  I wanna be a race bear!

“Denny would you just--”

“Stewart, Hamlin, you’re up for hot laps.  Oh, would you look at that.  Smoke actually decided to bring back the trophy.”

“That’s the rules, isn’t it?”

“Since when do you follow the rules?”

I know that voice.  It’s Green Eyes.  GREEN EYES!!!  It’s meeeeeeeeeeeee.  I’m in here.  The Bear Man put me in here.  Green Eyes, am I at the Fling Thing?  Is that what the roaring sound is?  Is it the little cars going round and round?  I wanna race with you!  We need to wiiiiiiiiiiiin!  Get me out of heeeeeeeeere!

“Heeeeey, Smoke, what did you do to the trophy?  Did you--”

“Hands off, Harvick.  It’s still mine.  You wanna play with it, you’re going to hafta win it from me.”

“Well aren’t you the big man.”

“What’s wrong?  Not feeling…lucky?”

“What’s that supposed to mean, Stewart?”

“Oh I think you know….”

“You fat, bastard.  I should’ve known it was you!”

“Alright, alright break it up.  Settle it on the track.”

“Oh I will.  You’re going down, Smoke!”

“Even without your good luck charm?  Bring it on, Harvick.”

Get him, Green Eyes, get him!  Beat him like you beat Cowboy.  Beat his fuzzy Bear Man butt and GET ME OUT OF HERE!  I don’t like being in the dark.  This is almost as bad as being shoved in a drawer.  Cowboy knows about that.  You saved him.  NOW SAVE MEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

“What was that about?”

“Sounds like Stewart’s the one who swiped Kev’s ‘good luck bear.’”

“His what?”

“You don’t get around much, do you Hamlin?  He’s had that bear with him since Daytona.  He and Bowyer think it’s lucky.”

“Are you serious?”

“Just be glad you don’t work at RCR.  He was on the rampage Monday.”

He missed me!  Green Eyes missed me!  Imaginary Todd said so.  At least I think that’s Imaginary Todd.  I’m sorry Green Eyes, I didn’t want to go.  He didn’t give me a choice.  But now you’re gonna save me, right?  You’re gonna win and get me out of here, right?  You have to get me OUT of HERE!

“He was that pissed over a stuffed bear?  What’s up with that?”

“Did you see where we finished at Bristol?  Hell, if Kev doesn’t work this out with Stewart I’m going to be going after him.”

“I think you’re all nuts.”

“Don’t let Kev hear you saying that.”

“He was that pissed?”

“Worse than when DeLana cut his dirt car budget.”

“Damn….”

Imaginary Todd, I know that’s you.  Would you really try and rescue me?  I knew you cared!  Are you helping Green Eyes?  You have to make him go really, really fast.  If he drags good then he can win and get me out of here.  I hear them.  Are you talking to him?  Can you help him?  Go, Green Eyes, go.  You can do it!  Go, go, GO!

“Check out Harvick, man.  He looks like a man possessed tonight.”

“Isn’t he always?”

“He all but took out Hamlin on the first turn.”

“That’s because he is on a mission tonight.”

“What’s that, DeLana?”

“He better be getting our bear back.”

What?  What? Did I hear you right, Blonde Bitchy One?  Did you say our bear?  Does that mean you miss me too??  You just like me cause you saw me naked, but I don’t care.  I miss you toooooooooo!  I wanna come home to you and Green Eyes!  I want out of this smelly thing.  Take me home, please, take me hoooooooooome.

“Holy crap!”

“Are you kidding me?!”

“Go, Kevin, GO!”

“Did he just win…backwards?!?”

“You better believe he did!  Tony better pay up now!”

Green Eyes!!!  Green Eyes, did you really win??  Green Eyes, I’m right HERE!  I know that laugh!  I know that yell!  That’s my Green Eyes.  And he won!  I knew he’d save me.  I knew it!

“Smoke, what the hell did you do to this troph--  Hey, Little Guy!  What are you doing in here?  Shoulda known you had to be around here somewhere.”

“What did he do, Kevin, tape beer cans around him?  Awww, he’s all dirty.”

“We can clean him up.  He’ll be ready to race this weekend.”

“Poor little thing.”

“Since when are you worried about him, D?  I thought he was ‘just a bear.’”

“Shut up, Kevin.  Aren’t they’re waiting on you for pictures?  Just don’t let anyone else swipe him again tonight, ok?”

“Don’t worry, sweetheart.  We’ll get Smoke back.”

Yaaaaaaaaaaay I’m home!  I’m home, I’m home, I’m hoooooooooome!  And I get pictures too.  Don’t worry Green Eyes, I’ll be ready to race.  Hey, the Blonde Bitchy One fixed my hat.  Thank you!  I got smooshed in there and not in a good way.  It’s good to be home.  Hmmm, maybe I should give the Blonde Bitchy One a new name, she is being really nice…. Naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

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Catw00man - catw00man@cryptoffic.com