Secret Agent Bear

Home : Stories by Catw00man : Bear on the Wall : Secret Agent Bear

Summary: The name’s Bear. Kevvie!bear.

AUTHOR: Catw00man
EMAIL: catw00man@cryptoffic.com
RATING: PG
SERIES: Bear on the Wall: Conversations from the Garage and Beyond
CHARACTER: Kevin Harvick, Clint Bowyer, Kevvie!Bear POV
PROMPT: Taming the Muse #132 (#107 for me) - Trap
COMPLETED: January 31, 2009
WORD COUNT: 933
DISCLAIMER: I own NOTHING and am affiliated with NO ONE mentioned here. Not the drivers, not the teams, no one. This is all fiction and fun. In other words...NOT REAL, NOT REAL, NOT REAL. ;-)
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Could it be? Could there possibly be a...plot? ;)
AUTHOR'S NOTE2: This is set during preseason testing when there’s not supposed to be any testing. You knew they’d find a work around.! LOL Apparently the RCR boys were testing in the little test track outside of Rockingham at the beginning of the week. Guess who went with them? ;)
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Testing track outside of Rockingham, NC - January 26, 2009

“Ok little guy, you’re gonna be my ears today.  There’s nothing like preseason gossip in the garage and you’re gonna hang out and hear it all for me.”

Is he serious?  I’m a “gossip bear” now?  C’mon green eyes, you can’t be serious.  How are you even--ok easy with the shirt now! 

“This little recorder will pick up everything.  You just hang tight on the crash cart and find me something juicy.”

Oh, well, at least I have a mission.  That’s different.  Here I thought I was just gonna be cute wrapping for a digital recorder…oh wait.  Guess it’s better than being a chew toy for that bug-eyed tongue with legs.  Who knows, maybe I’ll hear something good enough to earn my way into a racecar?  Green Eyes has kept to his promise in taking me everywhere.  Hopefully the next stop will be in the car instead of on the crash cart.

The engine roars in Big Yellow and Green Eyes is off to practice.  Least I get to see today.  Yesterday I was trapped in the home with wheels all day.  Maybe being all “wired up” won’t be so bad after all.  The scenery’s already better for sure.

“Did you see Mears showed up late today?”

“Well, he did just get back from the 24 hour thing in Daytona.  Did you hear how the car did?”

“Who cares, did you see who he was driving with?  That Danica’s a serious hotty.”

“Isn’t he engaged or something?”

“Yeah for the next year or something.  I bet he was still hitting th--oh hi Gil.  Yeah we were just getting on that….”

Who’s banging who?  Is that the best the garage has to offer?  Sorry Green Eyes, I think you’re going to be seriously disappointed if these nimrods are any indication.  Watch Laverne and Shirley get back to the big black car and wonder what the next tidbit will be.

Engines roar in the garage and I’m jostled a bit as some of Green Eyes’ boys dig around in the tools, but thankfully they don’t knock me over.  I’d hate to lose the recorder and go bust on my first ever assignment.  Now, if only someone would give me something good.

“You hear about Johnson down in Florida?”

“What did he do now, learn to shit gold?”

“Hell, no!  He was back up here in Charlotte yesterday getting his hand put back together.”

“What are you talking about?  I thought he was driving those prototypes, not surfing on golf carts ag--”

“No, this wasn’t a golf cart thing.  This time he stuck a kitchen knife through his hand.”

“He did WHAT?”

“Someone seriously needs to wrap his ass in bubble wrap.”

“Maybe that’s what’s up with the beard, someone stole all his razors….”

Ok, I don’t know who this Johnson guy is, but he sounds like a total tool.  They trust this guy with a 3400lb stock car when he doesn’t even know how to use a kitchen knife…or a golf cart?  Is this sport for real?  I hope Green Eyes keeps me away from that guy. I’d hate to be the next casualty on his list.

The guys in yellow clear out along with the gossips in black.  Must be break time because there’s not many left wandering around…except for the guy in yellow and black that walks like a cowboy.  He looks completely lost as he tugs at his ear and shuffles over my way.  Shouldn’t he be hanging out with his boys or Green Eyes or something?

“I see Harvick’s still draggin’ you around, huh?”

Wait…is he talking to me?  Dude, you do know I’m a bear, right?

“Leave it to him to do something weird like that.”

He rubs my paw between his fingers and then gives the bill of my hat a little tug.  Could he know about my mission?  Is he trying to break me?

“He probably just wanted somethin’ to fuss after, somethin’ to drive D nuts.  You are pretty cute though.”

Ok, now he’s just buttering me up.  I don’t care what you say Cowboy, I’m not gonna spill.  I’m taking this recorder to my grave!

“Least someone’s still havin’ fun around here.”

He looks over to the abandoned--at least for now--big black car and…why does he look so sad?  He didn’t look sad earlier.  Does he not like bears?

“It’s not fair you know, not even being asked.  Bet you know something about that don’tcha, just dragged around from place to place and stuck where ever someone wants ya.”

How does he know about that?  That’s a bear’s life though, being taken from place to place.  Better than being shoved in some drawer somewhere.  Is someone trying to shove the Cowboy in a drawer?

“That car used to be mine, ya know.  Used to be my crew, my crew chief.  But now…it’s not.  Now it’s his.”

I dunno who he is but I think I hate him already.  It’s not nice to be pushed around.  The blonde bitchy one does that with me.  At least Green Eyes looks out for me, but who’s looking out for the Cowboy?

“Listen to me, whinin’ like a crybaby.  It’s done.  Gotta suck it up already.  Just wish I could’ve kept Gil….  Anyway, thanks for listenin’ buddy, even if I have lost my mind.”

He pats me on my head and then shuffles off, probably to wherever everyone else went.  I hope my recorder got everything.  Green Eyes needs to hear this.  He needs to fix the Cowboy. 

Here’s hoping my first secret mission was a success!

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Catw00man - catw00man@cryptoffic.com