AUTHOR: Sophie
EMAIL: sophie_limbourg@hotmail.com
RATING: R
PAIRING: Buffy/Spike
SPOILERS: General S 6 – starts on Hell’s Bells. Kind of AU after that.
DISCLAIMER: Nothing is mine.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: For my story I pretended Anya and Xander got married. Normal Again didn’t happen. The rest is pretty much like on the show. Title and lyrics are from Josh Groban “You’re still you”. Also lyrics from Seal “Kiss from a rose.” Thanks very much to Heather and Anne Rose for the beta.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike was waiting for his date to come out of the bathroom. ‘What was she doing in there ?’ He thought, exasperated. Now that the whelp and his ex-demon girl were married happily ever after, he didn’t see any reason to hang out any more. And he was still a little shaken from his earlier conversation with Buffy. He couldn’t believe she had told him she was hurting. And he still couldn’t decide if it was actually a good or a bad thing. Like when she had broken up with him and had called him…

“ William?”

He turned around. It was that girl…Anya’s demon friend. The one that had locked them all in the casa Summers a few weeks ago. He couldn’t remember her name.

“ Hey…”

“ Halfrek.”

“ Right. Halfrek.”

Once again, an odd sense of familiarity came over him. Besides, that girl knew his real name…

“ Do we know each other?” He asked.

“ Yes, we do…but it’s been a long time. I’m not sure you’ll remember me. Can we…can we talk ?

More and more intrigued, he acquiesced.

“ Sure. Let’s go here.”

He opened a door, leading to a quiet library. He closed it behind them. Halfrek turned around, facing him. Her demon face was gone.

Spike stopped dead in his track.

“ Bloody Hell…Cecily ?

“So, you do remember me ?” Cecily asked, looking pleased.

“ Yeah…very well, actually.”

All his memories of Cecily had been rather painfully reawakened last year during that memorable conversation with Buffy.

“ What are you doing here ?”He asked, though the exact question should have been ‘How did you go from prude Victorian girl to vengeance demon?’

She laughed.

“ I could ask you the same question. Last time I saw you –or rather didn’t see you because you were in a coffin- was at your funeral. You were dead.”

“Well, I still am, technically. I’m a vampire.”

“ Oh…That explains a lot of things…and this interesting outfit…I love the duster, though.”

There was an awkward silence. Confused, Spike had no idea what to say next. Seeing her again, after what? about 120 years…This girl had been his first love. The one that had inspired his best poetry…Uh, his best awful poetry. She was still as pretty, looking maybe a little older than he remembered. But she was also the girl that had rejected him cruelly on this night when his life had changed forever.

“ Cecily…”

“ William…we can’t really talk right now . I have to go back to Anyanka. But I would like to see you again…I guess we have a lot of things to say.”

He raised an eyebrow.

“ Do we ? I thought all had been said and done last century…the ‘you are beneath me’ part was very clear to me.”

A painful look appeared on her face.

“ That’s precisely what I want to talk about. Please, William ?”

He finally agreed.

“Ok then. Tomorrow night. Do you know the Espresso Pump ?”

She nodded.

“ Let’s meet there around 8.00 pm”.

She smiled.

“ Thank you. I’ll see you then.”

She left, leaving the door open. Spike sighed. Bloody women…Like he hadn’t enough problems with one, a second arrived to complicate things a little bit more. Which reminded him…

“ Oh, balls !”

He had completely forgotten the third one…his date. Who must be rather pissed off for waiting so long. Yep, complicated was definitely the key word.

“ Xander and Anya are going to leave,” Dawn said. “And his family too, thank God for that.”

Buffy smiled.

“ Yeah…Demons are not always the ones who look like demons.”

“Like Anya’s friend…Halfrek. She’s rather nice, actually. Ok, she locked us all in the house, but after all it was kind of my fault…”

Buffy gave her a pointed look.

“…and that’s probably not a good idea to remind you that. Anyway, I saw Spike talking to her. He even disappeared with her in a room for some time…I didn’t know he was into that kind of girl. And Tarantula was mightily pissed off !

“ Who?”

“ His date. I don’t know her real name. But that one fits perfectly, don’t you think ?”

“ I suppose so…”replied Buffy absently.

Spike was bringing a girl and then disappeared with another ? She felt a pinch in her stomach. Oh, not because she cared. No, she was probably just hungry. After all, she hadn’t eaten since…two hours ago.

“ Buffy ? Buffy !”

She snapped out of her thoughts.

“ What ? Sorry, Dawn, I…”

“ You weren’t listening to me,” Dawn accused.

“ Yes I was ! I…”

“ What did I just say ?”

“ Well, you talked about Spike and his date.”

“ No, after that !”

Buffy could see her sister was really angry.

“ I’m sorry Dawn. I wasn’t listening” she admitted, feeling guilty.

“ As usual” said the younger in a bitter tone. “I’ll go find Tara or Willow. At least they listen to me.”

“ Dawn, wait…”

Buffy sighed. She knew her sister was right. She had problems focusing, these last few weeks. And she had thought that breaking up with Spike would arrange that. That she would have more time to spend with her sister and friends. But she couldn’t help wondering about him. What he was doing…where…with whom…I don’t care about him. I never did. He was just good in bed. Or rather…incredibly amazing…the way he…

Buffy felt a familiar twinge between her legs and gasped. Oh, God. I have to think of something else, and quickly !

“ Buffy ? Are you ok ? You look all flustered.”

“ Tara ! Um…I’m ok. It’s just...It’s really hot in here, don’t you think ?”

“ Well, actually I was looking for a sweater because I thought it was cold…but maybe you are the hot kind of person…”

She blushed.

“ Not in that way, of course…I mean…”

Buffy laughed and hugged her.

“ I know what you mean, Tara, don’t worry. And I feel better. Thank you.”

“ Oh…you’re welcome.”

“ Dawn told me Anya and Xander were leaving. I think we’re going to hit the road too. I’m kind of beat. Too much emotions…”

And not only from the wedding, she thought.

Tara acquiesced.

“ Dawn’s with Willow. I’ll get our coats”

Buffy headed towards Willow and her sister. Dawn was still clearly mad.

“ We’re gonna go home. Dawn, I’m sorry. I know I haven’t been the best sister in the world lately. I want to make up for that, ok ?

Tomorrow, we’ll go to the movie. Just you and me.”

Dawn pondered the idea for a few seconds. She finally made a half-smile.

“ Movie sounds good…Ok. But please, Buffy, try to pay more attention…”

“ I will…I promise.”

Dawn nodded but Buffy could see her sister was not entirely convinced. It was time for Dawn and her to renew the bond they had once shared…

“ Are you done with the training, Buffy ? We’re going to miss the movie.”

“ I’ll be ready in two minutes. Don’t worry.”

Dawn nodded and came back into the shop. It was closed now. But Anya was still there, doing her favourite activity: counting the money she had made during the day.

Xander was watching her fondly. They had decided not to go on honeymoon immediately, so they could save a lot of money and take a beautiful trip someday, to an exotic island somewhere.

“ Hey Dawn! Ready for our capitalism dance ?”

Dawn smiled.

“ No, thanks Anya. Not really in the mood.”

“Oh…problems at school ?

Dawn shrugged.

“No…It’s not important.”

Buffy arrived at that moment.

“Ok; I’m ready. Let’s go.”

She watched the clock.

“We still have some time. It only starts in 20 minutes.”

“ Yes, but I want to see the trailers. Bye Anya, Xander?”

“ Bye girls. Have a good time.”

As they walked on Main Street and passed in front of the Espresso Pump, Dawn took Buffy’s arm.

“Look ! It’s Spike and Halfrek…”

She entered the small coffee shop before Buffy had the time to stop her The last thing she wanted for the moment was to see Spike, especially Spike having coffee or whatever with another woman.

“Hey guys !” Dawn greeted them.

Spike and Halfrek both raised their heads in a perfect unison.

“Hello Nibblet. You’re on your own ?”

“No, Buffy is with me…was with me…here she is.”

A very reluctant Buffy approached the table.

“ Hey Spike…Halfrek.”

It was the first time Buffy had seen Halfrek with her human face, and she hated to admit it but she was a pretty girl.

“Slayer…”

“Hello, Buffy” Halfrek said. “Spending some quality sister-time ?” she asked with a knowing smile.

“We’re going to the movie” Dawn said.

Buffy was trying her best to avoid Spike’s gaze. She had to find something to say. Something to show it didn’t affect her the least to see Spike sitting cozily with another girl.

“I thought you guys didn’t know each other ?” she finally blurted out.

Great. So much for the not-obvious comment.

“Well, we do, actually. We’re like…old friends.”

“Right. Very old friends,” Spike added, with that cocky grin she loved and hated so much. Oh, she wished she could punch him right now to erase that smirk…or better, pour the hot coffee on his most precious parts…though that could provoke irreparable damages…

She realized she was staring at his so-called precious parts, and worst of all, he was staring at her staring at him. She blushed furiously.

“We have to go,” she said, rather rudely.

“Well…see you around.”

“Enjoy the movie” Halfrek said.

“ Bye Nibblet…Buffy.”

Buffy took Dawn’s hand and almost dragged her out.

“ Ok, that was kind of rude” Dawn said. “Are you jealous, or what ?”

“ What ? Of course not ! Don’t be ridiculous”

Dawn looked offended.

“ I’m certainly not the most ridiculous one here.”

Buffy stopped.

“Dawn. We’re here to spend some time together. I don’t want to talk about Spike.”

“ Geez, I really wonder why,” muttered Dawn.

They made it just in time for the movie, but the mood was ruined.

“Well…that was interesting” Halfrek said.

“What ?”

“ The little conversation we just had with Buffy and Dawn…What’s going on between you two ?”

“ The Nibblet ? Oh, I’m kind of her big bad brother…protect her and all that…she’s a wild kid. I like her”.

“Yes, I noticed that. But I was talking about Buffy.”

He shrugged.

“Nothing’s going on.”

Which was not really a lie. Nothing was going on * anymore*.

“ Let’s talk about you instead” he said, quickly changing the subject. “You said there were things you wanted to explain.”

She acquiesced, taking a sip from her coffee. She seemed to hesitate.

“ It’s been so long ago” she sighed. “I don’t know where to start…how to say this.”

“How to say what ?”

“That…that night I rejected you…in a really awful way, I know…well, that’s because I had no choice.”

Spike frowned.

“What do you mean ?”

“ My father had ordered me to marry Lord Cavisham. Everything was already arranged.”

“What ? That pompous old sod ?”

“Yes. I was furious. Furious because I had to marry a man twice my age, but also because I was in love with another man.”

“Ok, but what does it have to do with me ?”

Cecily looked in his eyes before replying.

“Because that man was you, William. I was in love with you.”

Spike was so shocked he couldn’t talk for some time.

“That night, I was looking forward to seeing you. The problem was my father knew it. He had probably read my journal,” she added with a disgusted look. “ Anyway…He threatened me about you…and I had no choice but to treat you like that…to be sure you would hate me.” She said with a pained expression.

“You sure succeeded in that.”

“I know…when they found your body the morning after…God, I had never felt so guilty in my life. But you remember that period…we girls had nothing to say, no opinions, no life, really.”

Spike nodded, remembering it too. He had just finished absorbing all she had said. There was no way he could have see that coming.

“You shouldn’t feel that way. Right, you hurt me that night…bloody much…but what happened to me then was the best thing that could happen.”

“You mean…becoming a vampire ?”

“ Yep…when I ran out, I went to hide in a barn. That’s where Drusilla found me. Drusilla’s my sire, you see. We were together for more than a hundred years, causing destruction and mayhem all over the world with Angelus and Darla. Those were the good old days,” he sighed. “Then the big Poof got all ensouled and that was over. It was just me and Drusilla…until three years ago, when she…when we broke up. I came back here.”

“Why?”

“ I had been here five years ago, for a short reunion with Angelus. He wanted to destroy the world again, you know, usual routine…but that didn’t suit me, so I teamed up with the Slayer. Our little Buffy, here” he said with a gesture to the cinema where she was supposed to be, but also with a fond smile he wasn’t aware of. “The Slayer and William the Bloody, fighting side by side…quite a sight, I must say.”

Cecily opened her eyes wide.

“ Wait…William the Bloody…That’s you ?”

Spike gave her a cocky grin.

“Yes, it’s me…My reputation never fails me.”

He frowned.

“Only I’m not very bloody anymore…with the chip and all…”

“Yes, Anya told me about that. But I had never made the connection…which is obvious now. I heard you killed two Slayers ?”

“True” he said with typical male pride.

“But you didn’t kill Buffy.”

The smile vanished.

“No.”

Fascinated, she looked at the sudden range of emotions running on his face. Love, anger…

“But you could have.”

“Several times.”

“And you didn’t.”

“No, I didn’t.”

“And I bet she had plenty of opportunities to stake you plain and proper.”

He smiled bitterly.

“More than I can remember.”

“But she didn’t either.”

Ok, the subject was too much Buffy-centred…Not good.

“Nope, she didn’t. Could we…?”

She interrupted him.

“ And are you guys doing other things together besides not killing each other ?”

She saw the look on his face and raised her hand.

“Ok, sorry, this is none of my business. I was just curious because of all that electricity between the two of you.”

“ Well, the electricity ran out of power.”

“ Was she the reason you came back here?”

“No…she was the reason I stayed.”

He seemed to regret saying that, but it was done. Cecily smiled knowingly, though a little sadly.

“A vampire in love with the Slayer…how romantic…and desperate.”

“That’s the exact word. Now, can we go back talking about you ? How did you become a vengeance demon ?”

“Oh, well…As you can imagine, I really didn’t want to marry that old cockroach. Nobody knew this, but I was a little into black magic…I performed a spell to make all his parts fall off…and it worked !”

She laughed out loud at the memory and he couldn’t help but do the same.

“ Yeah, I wanted to perform a spell like that on Angel. Too bad you weren’t around!”

“Well, we shouldn’t laugh, it was very mean of me to do such an improper thing…anyway, that caught the attention of D’Hoffryn. He offered me the vengeance job, and I said yes. It was much better than the life I was destined to have. Then I met Anyanka and we became friends. That’s it.”

Spike nodded, thoughtfully.

“Well…quite a destiny we both had, huh ?”

She smiled.

“ Yes…does that mean there are no hard feelings on your part ?”

“ For what reason ? I was a bloody stupid wanker and look at me : super-cool immortal vampire.”

He looked casual, but she could see it was just an act. She could almost feel the pain inside him…What had Buffy done to him?

“I’m glad, then. Sometimes I wonder what could have happened if I had admitted my feelings for you…”

He shrugged.

“Well, we’ll never know, right ? And maybe it’s for the best considering what we are now…I guess.”

He looked at the cinema across the street. She followed his glance and felt a pinch in her stomach. It was probably too early to ask him if…

“Are you seeing someone ?” he asked, out of the blue.

“Uh…no. I was, but…we broke up. Bad break- up.” She said.

“Yeah, tell me about it,” he muttered, without really thinking.

Cecily looked at him while he was finishing his coffee. Most of it was clear, now. He and Buffy had probably had an affair, and for
some reason, she had broken up with him.

“Do the others know ?”

He looked puzzled.

“Know what ?”

“About you and Buffy ?”

“Hell no ! Miss goody-two-shoes was way too ashamed…”

He stopped abruptly.

“How do * you * know ?”

“I guessed.”

She was obviously waiting for more, but he said:

“Don’t take it wrong, Cecily, but I don’t want to talk about the Slayer. It’s over anyway.”

Far from it, she thought. But I’ll work on that.

She smiled.

“Well, time to call it a night. I had a nice time.”

He smiled back.

“Yeah, me too.”

And he was surprised to see it was actually the case.

“Are you staying in Sunnydale?” He asked.

“A few more days, probably…but not longer, because I’m staying with Anya and Xander, and I suspect Xander wants me out of his hair.”

She laughed lightly.

“We could do it again,” said Spike suddenly. “Having a drink, I mean.”

He was probably as much surprised as her to hear him asking that. But it just seemed the natural thing to do. She looked delighted. A little bit too much, actually.

“I’d love that. What about tomorrow night ? The Magic Box, we can meet there.”

“Fine with me. Do you want me to walk you home ?”

She smiled.

“Still as chivalrous, I see. No, thank you. They live only a few blocks away.”

“Alright then. See you tomorrow.”

She took her bag and left. Spike paid for the drink. As he was passing in front of the cinema, he saw people coming outside. The movie was probably over. He walked faster. He had no desire to see Buffy. Now it would only be business between them. The rest was better forgotten.

Time to move on with his life.

Buffy couldn’t help but watch at the Espresso Pump when they left the cinema. Spike and Halfrek were gone…separately, or together ?

‘Stop !’ she thought. You broke up with him…it’s over.

Time to move on with her life.

Cecily had almost arrived at Anya’s condo when someone violently grabbed her arm.

“What…?”

“Who is he ?”

She recognized the voice before seeing his face.

“Simon ! What are you doing here ? You followed me ?”

“Who is this guy ?”

“Let me go ! “

She pulled out of his grip.

“This is none of your business ! You and me, it’s over. What part of over don’t you understand ?”

“It was your decision ! I had no say in it ! And my decision is, it’s not over.”

“Don’t be ridiculous ! You can’t force me to date you !”

“Date ? We were engaged !”

“Yes, well, that was a mistake.”

She realized that was probably not the best thing to say to a dumped man, especially one who was pissed off like that.

“Listen, Simon…I know this must be hard,” she said in a softer voice. “But you have to admit it…We’re done.”

“I don’t want to listen to that crap. Next time I see you with him, I’ll kill you.”

He left, disappearing in the shadow.

It’s just a mean threat, Cecily thought, shaken. He just wants to scare me. But even to her own ears, that was not very convincing.

When Spike arrived at the Magic Box the following night, Cecily wasn’t there yet. But Buffy was.

“Hey Spike,” Anya greeted him.

“Hey Anya…Buffy.”

She watched him, not bothering to answer. She looked clearly upset. With him.

Anya went to the basement and left them alone.

“So…you’re not seeing Halfrek, tonight ?”

Spike smiled. Ok…He got it.

“Jealous, Slayer ?”

She gave him a threatening look.

“Ok…forget I asked.” she sighed.

“ Why did you, then?” he asked with a mischievous grin.

“I said forget it , ok?”

“As a matter of fact, yes, I’m seeing her. We’re meeting here at 8.00.”

“And you’re early. How cute. Couldn’t wait to see her, apparently,” she said, trying to appear detached about it and totally failing.

Spike looked at her. Bloody Hell…she * was * jealous !

Before he could find an appropriate come back, Anya was back.

“What time is it ?” Buffy asked.

“Almost eight,” Anya said.

“Good. I have to get Willow at the…Oh my God, Dawn ! I totally forgot she had a field trip today. I’m supposed to pick her up at 8.15 !”

She put her hand on her forehead.

“Stupid me !”

“If you want,” proposed Anya, “ I can ask Xander…”

“It’s ok,” Spike interrupted. “I’ll get Nibblet.”

Buffy turned to him, surprised.

“I thought you had a date with Halfrek ?”

“Well, yeah. But it’ll take only a moment. I’m sure she’ll understand. And she likes Dawn.”

Buffy seemed to hesitate.

“What’s the problem ?”He asked, rather harshly. “I’m not gonna bite her, you know.”

Buffy realized he had taken her hesitation the wrong way.

“ No ! I know that, of course. It’s just, I wouldn’t want her to think I forgot about her…”

“Which is the case,” Anya pointed out.

“Yes, thank you Anya.” Buffy said.

“I’ll go catch Red, if you prefer.”

“No. It’s fine. Dawn’ll be glad to see you.”

“All right then. I’ll wait for Halfrek to…”

Just at this moment the demon girl came in.

“Perfect timing” Spike finished, with a bright smile to Halfrek, which disturbed Buffy. He had never ever smiled at her like that.

“I have to go get Dawn at her school” he told her. “You don’t mind, do you ?”

“Of course not” she smiled. “I’ll wait for you here.”

Buffy took her jacket and her bag. She felt reluctant to leave.

“I…I’ll go, then” she said. “Thank you, Spike, for taking care of Dawn.”

He nodded, not answering.

She left, soon followed by him.

“I’ll be back in a few,” he told Halfrek.

“Sure.”

He looked at her closely.

“Is everything alright ?”

“Yes, fine. Go, you’ll be late for Dawn.”

He frowned, but didn’t add anything. Something was clearly bothering her. He would find out soon enough.

Part 2

“Oh my God, was that day boring or what ?”

Dawn and her class had gone to LA to visit a special exposition at an art museum.

Dawn looked at Janice.

“I don’t know, I kind of liked it…”

“Hey, girls…check out the hottie over there…”

Their friend Susan pointed her chin to a blond man standing a little further. Dawn started to laugh.

“It’s Spike !”

“You know this guy ?” asked Susan, wide-eyed.

“Yes, he’s…um, he’s my sister’s boyfriend” Dawn said, the first plausible thing that came to mind.

“Well, introduce us !” asked Janice, excitedly, as Spike was coming towards them.

“Hey, Bit. Had a nice day ?”

“Yes, thanks. I’m surprised to see you.”

She walked up to him and hugged him. He looked a little bit puzzled but hugged her back.

“Big Sis had an emergency with Willow, so…”

“Spike, These are my friends Janice and Susan.”

“Evenin’, girls,” he said, slightly uneasy in front of these two giggling girls. One of them battled her eyelashes so hard he thought for a moment she had a compulsive disorder.

“Are you ready to go, Dawn?”

“Yep. Bye guys. See you tomorrow.”

“Bye Dawn, bye Spike!” T he two girls added, still laughing stupidly.

Spike took Dawn’s bag and walked towards his car.

“What was that all about ?”

“They think you’re a hottie.”

“I’m a …?”

He turned around, and saw the two girls still watching them. He frowned.

“Aren’t they a little bit young to entertain thoughts like that ?”

“Hey ! They’re my age ! We’re not too young to appreciate cute guys.”

He looked at her with a grin.

“Ok, I’m a hottie and I’m cute. Guess it’s a good day after all.”

They climbed in the car and Spike started the engine.

“So…you and Halfrek, huh ?” Dawn said with a knowing smile.

“What, ‘me and Halfrek, huh’ ?

“Well, I saw you talking at the wedding…then yesterday at the Espresso Pump…”

“Yes, so…?”

“She’s pretty.”

“That she is.”

“When she’s not in demon face, of course”

“Of course” answered Spike, in a neutral tone.

Dawn watched him with a slight smile.

“You’re not gonna tell me anything.”

He smiled back.

“But there’s nothing to be said, pet. Halfrek and I are just friends.”

Dawn laughed.

“Yeah, that’s always what celebrities say in the newspapers, then we discover they had sleazy affairs for months!”

“Well, I’m not a celebrity, so…though I would probably have been better than that Oldman bloke in ‘Dracula’. What with me having the real stuff, and all…”

He turned in Revello Drive, stopped in front of the Summers House.

“Here we go, princess.”

“Thank you.”

He got out of the car, headed with Dawn, to the front door, then suddenly stopped and turned around.

“What ?”

“Nothing. Let’s go.”

He smiled reassuringly, not wanting to frighten her. He had sense like someone…or something was watching them. Which was impossible, as no car had been following them.

Still, he felt an uneasy pinch.

Buffy was already there.

“Hey, Dawnie. How was your day ?

“Ok, I guess. But the best part was when Spike came. Janice and Susan were practically drooling !”

Buffy raised an eyebrow.

“Really ? Spike got himself a fan-club ?”

“Yep…want to be a member, Slayer ?” Spike asked.

She rolled her eyes.

“Thank you, but no, thank you.”

He shrugged.

“Well, I brought little sis safe and sound, so…I’m off. Goodnight, Nibblet.”

Once again, she put her arms around him and kissed him on the cheek.

“Thanks, Spike”

“Anytime, Luv.”

He watched her go upstairs with a fond smile. By the time he turned to Buffy, the smile was gone.

“Bye, Buffy.”

“Bye…and thank you.”

He opened the door.

“I didn’t do it for you. I did it for her.”

Buffy acquiesced. That hurt more than she thought.

“I know.”

He watched her. She looked so unhappy. Maybe he could…No ! Just get out of here, Spike.

“I’ll go now. Cec…Halfrek is waiting for me.”

“O…Of course.”

He nodded, started to leave.

“You still didn’t tell me how you guys know each other.”

He stopped, turned around. Was she trying to delay him ?

“Yes, I did. Last year. Remember our little conversation about my past ? That girl I was in love with…Cecily ? Well, that’s her. Halfrek is Cecily.”

“Oh…I see.”

His first love. Scary thought.

“How…”

“Listen, Slayer, I don’t have time for this now. I’ll tell you the whole story some other time, ok ?”

That felt as good as a slap in the face. She shrugged, making a false casual face.

“Ok. Not that it really interests me, anyway.”

“Like hell it doesn’t,” muttered Spike.

He reached his car, was about to open it. She was still standing on the threshold, kneading her hands. He sighed. Leave, Spike…you’re going to regret this…you bloody wanker… He came back to her.

“Ok, Slayer. What’s the problem ?”

Puzzled, she raised her head towards him. He was suddenly standing very close to her.

“You’re acting weird,” he said. “Is that because I’m seeing someone else ?”

She opened her mouth but he raised his hand.

“If you’re about to deny it for the zillion time, don’t bother. I know the tune already.”

He turned, started to leave again.

“I won’t !” She blurted out.

He stopped.

“You won’t what ?”

She approached him.

“Deny it. I won’t. I told you at the wedding it hurt. It still does. Whether it’s that skanky-ho, or Halfrek…I hate seeing you with another woman.”

They stared at each other, both surprised by her admission. Spike could almost felt his heart start beating. How long had he waiting to hear…he calmed himself. That was jealousy she was talking about…not love. He gently pushed her hair behind her ear, cupping her cheek in his hand. She closed her eyes.

“Do you regret it ?” he asked softly.

“What ?”

“Breaking up with me.”

She plunged her eyes into his blue ones, and swallowed hard.

“Yes” she whispered. “I do.”

“Well…”he said, wandering his mouth feather-like on her jaw and her neck, “That’s too bad…because I don’t.”

He tore himself from her, climbed in his car and drove away.

When Spike got back to his crypt, later that night, he still had the impression of being watched. And Cecily had acted weird the all evening. What was happening in these soddin’ women’s minds ? He thought, exasperated.

He stopped at his door, scrutinized the cemetery.

“C’mon ! Show yourself ! I know you’re out there !”

There was no answer, of course. He was just talking to air in the middle of the graveyard at night, like a bloody idiot. Shaking his head in self-pity, he entered his crypt and closed the door behind him.

“Buffy ? You’re ok ? You barely ate anything.”

Buffy pushed her plate away.

“You’ve been torturing that piece of chicken like it’s…I don’t know, anyone I know ?”

Willow asked, trying to lighten Buffy’s sombre mood.

Buffy managed to smile reassuringly.

“Probably some annoying Big Bad…Don’t worry, Will, I’m ok.”

“You were moody all day. Is everything ok at the Doublemeat Palace ?”

“Yes, everything is fine. I’ll just go patrol a little bit. Turning some nasty vampires to dust” she said, showing the staking move with her fork at the same time.

“Ok…”Willow said carefully.

Buffy put her jacket on, checking for the stake in her pocket.

“See you later, then,” Willow added. “Wishing you a lot of nasty vampires !”

“I’m sure to find at least one” Buffy muttered to herself.

She was being totally unfair and she knew it. She was mad because of the little act he had given her yesterday. For the first time, she had been totally open to him…and he had rejected her. Leaving her on the verge of tears. No, she had to be honest. She had cried for him. Because of him!

Then, after doing some more thinking, she had had to admit the truth. Spike had been treating her exactly the way she had treated him for months. All this time when he had bared his soul…no, wait, he didn’t have a soul…well, bared his deepest feelings to her, she had crushed them. Without giving it a second thought.

Oh God, she had been so blind ! So ungrateful…She realized that now. He must really love her very much to have accepted all that bad treatment from her. He had told her so several times, but she wouldn’t listen. Listen to him, but mostly to her heart. Her heart already knew.

Spike had shown more humanity these last few months than any of them…especially her. So he maybe didn’t have a soul, but he didn’t need one. And her biggest hope right now was that it was not too late to tell him that.

A slight knock on his door startled him. Spike wasn’t expecting anyone, and certainly not Cecily, who was standing in front of him when he opened the door.

“Cecily ?”

He frowned.

“Were we supposed to meet ?”

She smiled.

“No, no, I just came by, because…I wanted to talk to you.”

She looked uneasy. Intrigued, he stepped aside to let her come in.

“What’s the matter ?”

She stayed in the middle of the room, apparently with no intention of sitting down.

“William…” she started, clearly looking for her words. “I’m…I’m leaving Sunnydale in two days, and…and I was wondering if you would consider coming with me.”

Spike stared blankly at her for a minute.

“Cecily…”

She raised her hand.

“ I know you’re in love with Buffy,” she said. “But you told me it was over. So, is there any reason that keeps you here ?”

Dawn’s face appeared in his mind, and surprisingly enough, the Scoobies’. And his crypt, bloody SunnyHell and a lot of other memories, good and bad, that rushed through him.

But most of all, a vision of golden hair…

“No” He said.

“I know we haven’t seen each other for more than a hundred years, but I thought…that this could be a second chance for a fresh start. I never forgot about you, William…You’ve been my first and only love.”

He smiled.

“That’s a strange declaration coming from a vengeance demon.”

“I know…but I’m still a woman too. Please…will you think about it ?

He hesitated.

“I promise” he finally said.

“Thank you. I’ll go now. You know where to find me.”

“That I do. Goodnight, Cecily.”

She left, closing the door behind her.

Spike sat, hardly believing it. His first love, asking him to go with her. After a century. And he was actually starting to consider it seriously. He was repeating himself, but wasn’t there something about moving on ?

Another knock on the door.

“What is this?” He grunted. “Open House?”

He opened it.

“Buffy.”

That evening was becoming more and more interesting.

“Since when do you knock on my door ?”

“Since I decided to stop treating you like dirt.”

He raised his eyebrow, open the door wider.

“In that case…suit yourself.”

She entered the crypt, went to stand on the exact same spot where Cecily was a few minutes before.

How ironic, Spike thought. Is this declaration night ?

“ I just came by…because I had something to tell you.”

Ok, now that was becoming creepy.

“Lemme guess…you’re leaving Sunnydale and want me to come with you.”

She stared at him, confused.

“What ? No…I…what are you talking about ?”She frowned.

“Never mind. Go on.”

“I’m sorry. For all that happened. And for the way it happened.”

He cocked his head, watching her, saying nothing.

“I…we’ve been treating you very badly. I know that. I was wondering if…if maybe we could start over…as friends.” She finished, lamely. That’s not what she had wanted to say, but for the life of her the words wouldn’t come out.

He gave her an incredulous look.

“Friends ? Are you kidding me ? Buffy, I told you once, about Angel, the two of you would never be friends. Well, that’s true for you and me too.”

“But Angel was…”

“I know, sorry, how did I dare compare myself to the big love of your life ? If I had a soul and was all broody, would you like me much ?”

“That’s not what I was going to say,” she told him angrily. “You’re not making this easy for me.”

“Really ? And why would I? Huh, why? I have that clear bloody vision of you, only a few weeks ago, beating me like crap, and leaving me on the ground, not caring very much what could happen to me next. So, excuse me, but I’m done with your selfish behaviour.”

She lowered her head, fighting the tears that threatened to overflow.
No matter how hard he was trying to be angry with her, seeing her so miserable was hard to take.

“ Buffy…you have to get over yourself. I know you’ve been through a lot…but it’s no reason to treat people like you do. And I’m not talking only about me. Do you realize you forgot about your own sister? The very one you sacrificed yourself for?”

She nodded, not able to answer. He was telling the truth. He was always telling the truth, but it was so much more convenient not to listen to him.

“Is it too late ?” She finally asked in a trembling voice. “For us?”

He was almost ready to take her in his arms but refrained. There was still a lot to be said and done before.

“ I don’t know. You see, I’m wondering…would you be here tonight if it wasn’t for that thing with Cecily ?”

Taken aback, she didn’t answer immediately.

“ To be honest…I don’t know. But it certainly helped me figure out some things about my feelings for you.”

“What I wanted was for you to figure that out by yourself.”

She laughed slightly.

“Oh…I’m too much of a coward for that.”

“You’re not a coward. You’re the bravest…but you know that already. And if you think you have feelings for me…well, come back when you’re sure.”

She nodded slowly.

“What about Halfrek…or Cecily…or whatever you’re calling her.”

“Cecily. Well, Cecily is my private life. And you’re not a part of it anymore.”

Despite the hurt, she smiled. He was really giving her a taste of her own medicine.

She sighed.

“ I think I got the message.”

He nodded, fighting the urge to send all his bloody well turned phrases to hell and ravish her downstairs. And the worst part was he knew now for sure she wouldn’t say no.

“Were you patrolling?”He asked.

“Yes. But I think I’m done for tonight. I’ll just…go home.”

He took his leather coat.

“I’ll go with you. Something’s been sneaking around here, these last few days…I don’t like it.”

Buffy was immediately back in Slayer mode.

“Really ? What do you think it is ?”

He shrugged, closing the door of his crypt behind them.

“Wish I knew…but it doesn’t have friendly intentions, that I’m sure of.”

“Do you sense it now ?”

He stopped, smelling the air.

“No…It’s the…”

A huge explosion interrupted him. By reflex, Spike plunged on the ground, taking Buffy under him. A little disoriented by the blow, they turned around and saw the crypt.

“Are you ok ?” he asked Buffy first.

“I think…Oh my God, what…?”

“Bloody HELL !”

He stood up and ran to his crypt. Or rather what was left of it.

“ Who did this ?” he shouted in an angry and menacing voice. “Show yourself you bastard !”

He was rummaging through the debris, to see if there was still something to save. Apparently not. And the stone was very hot and smoking.

Still on the ground, Buffy sat down, feeling dazed. The full impact of what just happened hit her. My God, she thought, a few minutes ago we were in there…if Spike hadn’t proposed to come with me…the idea was so horrifying she felt a wave of nausea ran through her.

Spike was still trying to see if there was something left in the debris, but it looked hopeless.

“Aargh !” he yelled, frustrated. That had been his crypt, his home for the past two years…he had made it a comfy place, and it was full of memories, with Buffy, Dawn, even Joyce…

The anger suddenly left, replaced by sadness. He went back to Buffy. She was sitting on a tombstone, looking very pale.

“Can you believe this ? Who…?”

He stared more closely at her, noticing the unusual paleness and stillness.

“Hey, Buffy? Are you ok?” he asked again.

She raised her eyes to meet his. They were full of frightened realizations.

“No” she whispered. “You were there…”

He frowned. “So were you.”

“Yes, but…I left. If you hadn’t come with me…”

“Well…I would fit into the vacuum cleaner by now.”

“Don’t say that !” she yelled, angry. “You nearly died!”

“At least definitely, this time. But it seems you saved my butt.”

“What ?”

He looked at her like she was a simpleton.

“If you hadn’t come around, I wouldn’t have left with you. I would really be Mr Big-pile-of-dust this time.”

“Ok, maybe…that doesn’t make me feel better.”

“Why do you feel bad, exactly ?”

“Spike ? Hello? Your crypt just blew up ! And you were supposed to be inside !! Don’t you think I care about this ? About what would have happen ?”

“How would I know ? You never told me really. It’s the first time you tell me you care about me ! And it took my bloody crypt to explode for you to tell me !”

Now he was furious again.

A vampire chose that moment to crawl out from his grave.

“That’s so not the moment, buddy” Buffy said, staking him on the spot.

The interruption calmed them down a little bit. Buffy put the stake back in her pocket.

“I do care, Spike. A lot. Very much. Would I be here tonight If I didn’t ? Ok, I was probably not Miss Obvious 2002…”

He gave her a ‘you bet’ look.

“If I had lost you…”she shivered. “Ok, this is so scary I don’t even want to think about it.”

Another vampire approached them. Spike sighed. Buffy held out the stake for him.

“Have some respect, will you” he told the vampire. “I just lost my home…and my telly.”

The vampire didn’t have the time to absorb the news. He was dusted in the second that followed.

“We’d better be off” Spike said. “The explosion probably woke up the entire neighbourhood”

“I think I can take some more…” Buffy said while standing and stumbling on her shaky legs.

“Sure you can.” Spike said with an ironic glance, while helping her to get steady on her feet.

“I’m not feeling hundred percent myself, so…no more dusting tonight.”

He stopped.

“Ok…where will we go ?”

This time he was the simpleton.

“What do you mean, where ? My house, you silly. Where else ?”

“Alright. I just didn’t want to invite myself. That’s not very polite.”

“Yeah, and that stopped you before. Which reminds me I probably lost some pieces of lacy underwear in that explosion.”

“Hey, be nice. You’re talking to homeless guy, here.”

“Well, I’d rather have you as homeless guy than dead-undead guy.”

She had said that last phrase in a softer tone, showing she truly meant it. He put his arm around her shoulders and they walked back to her home.

The following day, Buffy summoned everyone at the Magic Box. She told them the latest news.

“Wow!” Willow said. “That’s going through a lot of trouble to get rid of Spike. Why not just stake him ?”

“Well, I’m not that easy to stake. Buffy knows something about it, right, love ?”

“We can verify that later, if you insist,” she said with a suave smile. “Anyway, it’s not the ‘why’ I wonder but more the ‘who’. So, Spike…who did you royally piss off lately ?”

Xander raised his hand.

“Spike pissed me off several times. But I have nothing to do with his crypt going boom.”

“Xander” warned Anya.

Spike shrugged.

“How would I know ? We’re on the Hellmouth, we’ve got a bunch of bleedin freakin people out there who get pissed off for nothing…”

“We don’t even know if it’s a human, or a demon…” Tara added.

“He’s human.”

Everyone turned to Halfrek, who was standing at the door.

“His name is Simon. He’s my ex- fiance. He threatened me two nights ago, but I didn’t take him seriously. Big mistake, apparently.”

“He threatened you ?” asked Spike, concerned.

“Just said that if he saw me with you again, he would kill me. I thought he said that to scare me…”

“Why didn’t you tell me last night ?”

Buffy reacted to that.

“Last night ?”

“I’m so sorry Spike” Halfrek said with a pleading look. “I would never have thought…”

He came to her, put his arm around her shoulder, much to Buffy’s irritation.

“Don’t worry,” he told her gently. “It’s ok.”

Buffy gasped.

“It’s ok ? It’s ok ? Spike, your crypt exploded last night ! And you almost exploded with it ! I don’t see what’s ok about that.”

Everybody looked at her, surprised by her outburst.

“I understand you’re upset” Halfrek said. “The worst thing is that this wasn’t aimed at Spike. Simon wants to kill me.”

“Maybe, but by blowing up his crypt, he was sure to get rid of the both of you. So I guess he was a little bit anti-Spike as well.” Xander said.

“For once, monkey-boy is right.” Spike agreed, attracting a murderous glance from Xander.

“You don’t have to feel guilty, Cecily. It’s not your fault if this guy’s a loony.”

“Well, she dated him…” Muttered Buffy but it was covered by Willow’s question :

“What did you call her ?”

Halfrek smiled

“He called me Cecily. That was my name, before I became a vengeance demon.”

“Why did you change ?” Tara asked.

“Well, Cecily is not really a frightening name, is it ? Halfrek is much more impressive.”

Buffy stood up.

“Ok, people, could we go back to the freak who’s trying to kill Spike ?”

“Funny,” noticed Anya,“when you talk like this you remind me of the Bot.”

“Not helping, Anya.”

“I thought he was trying to kill Halfrek ?” Willow asked carefully.

“Either way there’s a killer wanna-be out there. We have to stop him.”

Spike raised his hand.

“Am I the only one who noticed the ‘him being human’ part ? I can’t be of much use, in that case.”

“You don’t have to,” Halfrek said. “He’s my ex-fiancé, I’m the one who should take care of him.”

“Maybe, but since he blew up my home, I’m kinda taking that personally.” Spike replied.

“Can’t you curse him or something?” asked Buffy.

“No,” Anya intervened. “We can only grant wishes. Not…wish them.”

“You mean you could, honey” Xander corrected her.

Anya sighed.

“Yes, of course…I was talking for Halfrek.”

“The problem is we don’t know where to find him. So there’s only one option. Spike and Halfrek have to serve as bait.” Buffy proposed.

“Supposing he’s watching you, Halfrek, if he understands that his warning of last night wasn’t enough, he’ll take that as a provocation and try again. But this time we will be there. And he’s driven mad with jealousy. So I expect him to do something stupid…well, I hope.” Buffy sighed.

“Like you say, it’s our only option” Spike said. “We can meet with Cecily tonight.”

Buffy nodded.

“We’ll be watching your back.”

“In the meantime,” Spike said, “I’m still homeless.”

“Is this the part where we’re supposed to cry ?” Xander asked.

“Xander !” This time it was Anya, Buffy, and Willow.

“Spike will stay at my house,” Buffy said in a firm tone, with a ‘I don’t want any discussion about this’ look.

Xander frowned, but was wise enough to not add anything.

“You’re not working, today ?” Spike asked Buffy when they were back at Revello Drive.

“No. It’s my day off. But I’ve got a lot of things to do in the house. Exciting stuff, like laundry, cleaning…”

“Can I help ?”

She gave him an ironic glance.

“Sure. You can do the ironing.”

“If that includes your panties, I’m on.” He said with a devilish grin.

“I’m gonna pretend you didn’t say that.”

While she went upstairs, he took a magazine, turned the radio on and sat in the couch.
When Buffy came down, a few moments later, she heard him singing along a song on the radio.

Surprised, she asked him:

“You know that song ?”

“What ? ‘Kiss from a rose’ ? Sure. Like it. Reminds me of you and me.” He grinned.

She listened to the lyrics.

There is so much a man can tell you
So much he can say
You remain
My power My pleasure My pain, baby
To me you’re like a growing addiction that I can’t deny
Won’t you tell me is that healthy baby ?
But did you know
That when it snows
My eyes become large and the light that you shine can be seen…

She blushed slightly.

“Yeah…If you have a good imagination.” She muttered.

He smiled, and she couldn’t help but go sit next to him. There was something about him… “a grown addiction that I can’t deny”…maybe that song was fitting after all.

“I didn’t know you liked Seal.”

“Not especially. But I like that song.”

She nodded.

“You have a nice voice.”

He looked at her, wondering what was going behind that pretty face of her.

“Thank you…what is this ? National Slayer’s kindness day ?”

“No” she said, looking offended. “ That was just a compliment.”

“Well, it’s rather unusual coming from you.”

“Maybe you didn’t give me any reason to compliment you.”

“Oh, I can already think about one or two…or three…”

“I wasn’t talking about * that *” she told him, blushing more furiously. “But…”she added with a sudden naughty look “If you really want to hear it…then yes, you are incredibly good in bed.”

She had hoped to destabilize him, and it worked. Beyond her expectations. She could have swear he had…

“You’re blushing” she teased him.

“Of course not. Vampires don’t blush.”

Sitting so close to her, with her intoxicating smell…he felt himself getting hard. He had to find a safe topic.

“Do you think our little plan will work ?”

“What ? Oh, you mean for tonight…” She shrugged. “To be honest, I don’t know. We don’t know that guy, how he will react…I’m used to deal with vampires and demons, not humans.”

“Well, humans can be more twisted than vampires and demons, sometimes.”

She smiled sadly.

“True. You know something about it, right ?”

“I do. And please stop being so nice. It’s scary, and disturbing. I’m evil, remember ?”

“No, you’re not. Sorry if that’s an insult to you, but I don’t see you like that anymore.”

“Oh yeah ? And what if I got rid of the chip, huh ? Would you trust me then ?”

“I trust you already” she defended herself. “You could hurt me, and I kept coming to you, right ?”

“You came for the shagging.”

“No ! Well, maybe at the beginning. But then…I started to like you.”

He gave her a disillusioned look.

“Me or what I did to you ?”

“Both…but mostly you.”

Spike was torn. Only yesterday he was considering leaving this town for good…with another woman. And now…now this girl he loved more than unlife itself was telling him those words…not exactly what he was waiting for, but almost. And, for the first time, he was having doubts. Was there really a future for them ? The Slayer, the Vampire…light and darkness…maybe he should leave, it would probably be the best for her in the end…

His eyes widened in horror. Bloody Hell ! He was starting to think like Peaches !

“What ?”Buffy asked, seeing the emotions on his face. “What are you thinking ?”

“Nothing. Didn’t you say something about urgent chores ?”he said, trying to change the subject.

“Not if you want to talk.”

He sighed, turned to her. With his knuckles, he caressed her cheek.

“ Buffy…Love…Do you really think it is talking that I have in mind ?”

She made the move and their lips met. Then their tongues. Suddenly, she was feeling whole again. She put her arms around his neck, bringing him closer. His hand threaded its way between her legs, reaching her hot and already wet center. She felt his fingers softly brushing her most sensitive spot and gasped, instinctively opening her legs to give him better access.

“Spike…”she moaned, and the sound of her voice only increased his strong arousal. He wandered his mouth along her neck. Her scent was so enticing he vamped out. She could feel his fangs gently scratching the soft skin, but she wasn’t afraid. She was excited like she never had been before.

Then it brutally stopped.

He let go of her and literally fled to the basement, leaving her panting and highly frustrated.

Later that afternoon, Halfrek came to the Summers house and entered through the back door. She found Spike sitting on the island of the kitchen, staring absently at a now empty mug.

“Hey,” she said with a smile.

Her smile disappeared when she saw the look on his face.

“What happened ?”

He shrugged.

“Nothing. Nothing new.”

She frowned.

“Did you had a fight ?”

He laughed bitterly.

“ Not really, no. Things are so bloody complicated…”

“Does that mean you’re staying ?”

“It’s a hard decision…I don’t know.”

Halfrek smiled sadly.

“Oh, I think you do, William. Yesterday you were considering leaving, and now you’re moving in with her.”

“I’m not…it’s temporary. The sooner I’m out of here, the better.”

Something serious must have happen between those two. He seemed so broken, so desperate. She came closer, put her hand on his shoulder.

“Did you tell her about your leaving ?”

“You’re leaving ?”

They both turned to the door where Buffy was standing, watching them with incredulity. Spike immediately stood up.

“Buffy…”

“You’re leaving ?” she repeated. “With her ? Is that why…Oh my God…”

She turned back, running upstairs.

“Buffy !” Spike shouted, ready to go after her. But Halfrek stopped him.

“Wait…I’ll go talk to her.”

He took her hand.

“I’m sorry, Cecily. I love her too much to leave. And I don’t care if that makes me a pathetic bloke…”

“Don’t worry. I understand. It wasn’t probably a good idea anyway. When you know what true love is…you can’t go for less.”

She left him, going upstairs to find Buffy.

Buffy was in her room, furiously rummaging through her weapons chest. Halfrek watched her with horror.

“You’re not gonna stake him, are you ?”

“What…? Of course not ! I’m looking for the most appropriate weapon for tonight.”

Halfrek relaxed.

“Does that mean you’re still helping us ?”

“I said I would help you. This…doesn’t change anything.”

For a moment, Halfrek considered telling her Spike was not leaving. But after all, Slayer or not, the girl deserved a little hard time too…

“ I’m sorry to tell you this, Buffy, because you’re going to help us, but…you don’t deserve him.”

“I know” Buffy stated simply.

A little surprised, Halfrek asked:

“You do?”

“Yes. I realize that now. But it’s too late. I pushed him away. It’s all my fault.”

“You feel guilty about him ?”

“Yes…among other things. But you’re a vengeance demon. How can you understand what guilt is ?”

“Guilt ? I know something about guilt, believe me ! It was my fault if William rushed out that night and met that vampire…whatever her name was. Because I had rejected him when the only thing I wanted was to hold him. And you know the worse ? He actually thanked me for it ! Because immortality allowed him to meet you ! That’s what he told me. But you broke his heart, now. You broke him. Because you’re a self-conscious bitch who can’t see what’s in front of her own eyes !”

Buffy looked so shocked that Halfrek calmed down instantly.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said…”

“No” Buffy interrupted her. “You are right. Completely right. I’m everything you said, and more.”

She sat on the bed, put her hand in front of her eyes, fighting the tears and failing. Halfrek looked at her in pity. The girl was obviously very much in love with him, but had no idea how to deal with it. Sighing, she sat next to her.

“ Buffy…It’s not too late. Don’t make the same mistake I did...If you love him, tell him, for God’s sake. You’ll feel so much better, believe me.”

Despite her tears, Buffy smiled.

“You’re talking like him.”

“ I guess it must be true, then.”

Buffy wiped her wet cheeks.

“Don’t take him away…please.”

“It’s not my decision…It’s his. Do the right thing, and he’ll stay. He loves you…I don’t remember seeing someone so much in love before…and a soulless vampire, well, that’s certainly a first !”

Buffy nodded, hope rising again. Things were getting suddenly very clear. They heard voices downstairs.

“The others are there. We should go.” Halfrek said.

“Ok. Go ahead. I’ll meet you in a sec.”

Halfrek left the room. Buffy went to the bathroom, put some cold water on her face.

Back to business, now.

“Ok, guys…Who wants pizza ?”

Part 3

They were all sitting around the coffee table, finishing the pizza and discussing the plan for tonight. Or the lack of it.

“ Cecily and I will just sit for some time at the Espresso Pump. Then we’ll leave, hand in hand, and take a stroll on quieter, dark streets. We can only hope he will do something.”

“Did you find which weapon you want to use ?”Halfrek asked Buffy.

“Not really. I have no intentions of killing him, if I can avoid it. Maybe something…really heavy ?”

Xander smiled.

“Ok. Back to the basic and the good old base-ball bat.”

Buffy turned to Tara.

“ You don’t mind staying here with Dawn, do you ?”

“What ?”The teenager exclaimed. “I don’t want to stay here ! I want to come with you !”

“That’s out of the question ! Dawn, we don’t know what that guy has in mind. It could be really dangerous.”

“ But you’ll all be there ! And Spike ! What could possibly happen ?”

“Nibblet…”Spike intervened. “Last time, I couldn’t help you and your sister died.”

There was a short silence.

“Ok.”

Dawn was obviously not convinced but she didn’t add anything. Buffy mouthed a silent thank you to Spike.

“All right then.” Buffy stood up, giving the signal for departure.

“Let’s rock and roll” Spike said with an ironic glance towards Xander, who answered by childishly sticked out his tongue at the vampire.

“Be careful guys” Tara said.

“It’s been an hour. Do you think he’ll show himself ?” Willow asked.

“Wish I knew…I don’t think he’s gonna do anything right now. Probably when they will be alone.”

They were waiting in the entrance of the Sun theatre, just in front.

“Hey, this movie looks good” Willow said, watching the advertising screen caps displayed.

“Wanna come back tomorrow ?”

“Uhuh…”Buffy said absently, watching Spike and Halfrek. Willow noticed the upset look on her friend’s face.

“Do you think she loves him ?” the redhead asked.

“Halfrek ? No…but I do.”

“What ?”

Buffy realized she had said that out loud.

“I…I love Spike.”

“What ?” Willow repeated. “When did that happen ?”

“Will, it’s not the moment…”

“Buffy ! You can’t tell me you’re in love with Spike and then tell me it’s not the moment !”

“Willow, I promise to tell you everything about it…well, that is if there is still something to tell.”

She still had to convinced him to stay…

“Are you happy ?Is it what you want ?”

“Yes. I’m happy and it’s what I want. He’s what I want.”

Halfrek was right. Admitting it felt incredibly good.

“Then it’s fine with me.”

Buffy turned to Willow and hugged her.

“Thank you Will.”

“I’m not going to condemn you. You will need all your strength to face our friend.”

“You mean Simon ? He’ s not…”

“No. I meant Xander.”

“Oh. Right. Well, I never told him anything about marrying his ex-demon, so…I just hope he will be as understanding.”

“You honestly think he will ?”

“Honestly ? No.”

At Revello Drive, the two girls were finishing cleaning the kitchen.

“Are you still mad ?” Tara asked.

“No…I understand Buffy. And what Spike said…I know he’s still hurting about that, not saving Buffy and me from Glory. I just wish I could grow up faster.”

“Well, being a grown up is less easy and cool that you think.”

“I know. I see Buffy struggling with problems everyday, plus she has to take care of me, and she’s only twenty-one. I gave her a hard time…but it’s getting better now.”

Tara smiled softly.

“Yes, she told me you and her had some good times lately…I’m glad everything’s fine between you two.”

“It’s not late” Tara added. “I’m gonna take a shower, then we can watch a movie
together ?”

“I’m in” said Dawn enthusiastically.

Tara went upstairs while Dawn turned the TV on.

She switched the channels, searching for something interesting.

The doorbell rang.

“Are they back already ?” she thought.

“Who is it ?” She asked through the door.

“FedEx, miss. I’ve got a package for Buffy Summers.” Dawn opened the door.

“Hi. My sister’s not…”

The man in front of her was holding a gun.

“I know she’s not there. But we’re going to see her very soon.”

“I’m ready, Dawnie. Which…”Tara stopped down the stairs. The front door was open. Dawn was nowhere to be seen.
“Oh my God.”

“Ok. They’re moving. Let’s follow them.”

Buffy made a sign to Xander and Anya who where on the other side of the street. They started to walk casually, holding hands, like two normal lovers.

“You know, that guy, Simon, he doesn’t know us. Do we really have to hide ?”

“He’s been watching Halfrek for some time. Maybe he saw her with us. We can’t take the chance.”

“You’re right. I hadn’t thought about that.”

Spike and Halfrek left Main Street, heading to further streets that Spike knew well along the cemetery. If Simon wanted to make a move, that would be the perfect place.

“You know” Willow whispered, “I just thought…if the guy knows us…then he knows where you live, too.”

Buffy looked at Willow, the implication of what the witch had just said slowly sunk in.

“Halfrek !”

Halfrek and Spike turned around.

“It’s about ti…”Spike started to say, then froze in dread fear. He heard Halfrek gasp.

Simon was there. He was holding Dawn, and against her temple, a gun.

“Simon, please !” Halfrek pleaded. “Don’t do this !”

Buffy, Willow, Xander and Anya came rushing and stopped abruptly when Simon pointed the gun at them.

“I can’t believe this” Xander said. “He tricked us !”

“Don’t hurt her” Buffy asked. How could she have not think about that ? By trying to protect Dawn too much, she had thrown her right into the lion’s den.

Halfrek made a step towards Simon.

“Simon, let her go. She has nothing to do with us…This is between you and me.”

“I know it’s about you and me ! It’s all I think about ! You, you, always you ! Can’t you see how much I love you ?”

In other circumstances, Spike would have felt pity for the guy. He understood completely what he felt. But for the moment that loony was holding his Nibblet with a gun on her head, so he wasn’t too inclined to understanding right now. But the fact that the guy was human prevented him from doing anything.

“I know you love me. And…I thought about us. I think we need to talk. Seriously.”

“The only thing I want to hear is that you come back to me” Simon said, starting to cry.

“I can’t come back to you as long as you’re holding her.” Halfrek said in a sweet voice.

“Come on, Simon, this isn’t you. Threatening to kill people…acting like this…Where is the man I was so much in love with ?”

At those words, Simon seemed to relax and dropped lightly the gun.

Spike took the chance. He threw himself at the guy, and with only the sake of Dawn in mind, punched him hard before collapsing on the ground with a painful cry.

He had succeeded. Simon was knocked out and Dawn rushed to Xander.

“Spike !” Buffy shouted, kneeling beside him and taking him into her arms.

She saw Dawn was safe with Xander and get her attention back to the vampire.

“Spike ? Are you ok ?”

She could see he was struggling with the excruciating pain.

She nursed his head against her chest, murmuring comfort words.

Halfrek tended to Simon, who was regaining consciousness.

Anya took the gun.

“It’s not loaded” She said.

Buffy gave Simon a murderous look.

“What ? You mean Spike suffered hell for nothing ?”

Dawn kneeled on the other side, taking the vampire’s hand.

“It wasn’t for nothing. He did it to save me.”

Spike opened his eyes, tried to smile to her despite the pain.

“I did save you, huh, lil’bit ? I didn’t fail you this time.”

“No, you didn’t” said the teenager, hugging him and kissing him on the cheek.

Buffy caressed his face.

“Are you going to be ok ? You’d better be. How could you do this ? It could have killed you !”

“Well…Dawn’s more important…and it was bloody worth it,” he said, nesting her head between her breasts.

“What is happening here ?”asked Xander, suddenly realizing Buffy’s attitude towards Spike.

“Later, Xander.” Willow told him with a warning glance.

Spike slowly stood up, grimacing.

“I’ll be ok. I just need about a thousands aspirins.”

“Well, we have a gun” Anya said. “We can rob a pharmacy.”

Tara arrived at that moment, breathless.

“Buffy ! Dawn ! Oh my God, you’re ok. Buffy, I’m sorry. I don’t know…”

“Don’t worry, Tara, we’re all fine. There’s not much you could have done anyway.”

They all headed back to the center of town.

“I’m really sorry” Simon said. “I…I lost my mind. I wanted Halfrek back so much…”

“Threatening to kill people is not really the best way to win your girlfriend back, you know” Willow advised him.

“It worked with Dru, sometimes” muttered Spike under his breath.

He met Buffy’s look and smirked.

“I understand that now” the other guy said. He turned to Buffy.

“I can’t apologise enough…Do you think you’ll be able to forgive me ?”

“Let’s see…you tried to kill my friend and threatened to do so with my sister. So I think…No.”

Simon frowned.

“ Your friend ? I didn’t try to kill your friend.”

“ Stop lying!” Halfrek said, angry. “ You blew up Spike’s crypt !”

“Me ? I did not ! I swear I didn’t do it !”

And the look on his face was really surprised.

They all looked at each other.

“Then…”

“Oh, that’s bloody brilliant !” Spike exclaimed. That means there’s another bleedin’ lunatic out there who wants to kill me.”

“ That, or you let the gas open” Xander said.

“Xander !”

Back at the Summers’ home, everyone was a little bit exhausted by the events. Dawn, Tara and Willow immediately went upstairs.

“What do you want to do, Halfrek ?”Anya asked.

The demon girl looked at her ex-fiancé.

“I’ll stay with Simon. I think we have to talk.”

“Ok, then, everyone…Goodnight” Xander said. “Buffy…I think I will need some explanations about something…” he added with a pointed look to Spike.

“Oh, Come on, Xander” Anya exclaimed. “Explanations about what ? Buffy and Spike having sex together ? Let’s go home and I’ll explain to you what sex is.”

She took him by the end and pulled him behind her.

“Bye guys !” she said, waving her hand.

Halfrek smiled to Spike and Buffy.

“I can’t thank you enough for what you did.”

Buffy made a dismiss gesture.

“Nah…It’s nothing.” She turned to Simon. “You’d better listen to her. She has wise advice” she said, sharing a knowing smile with Halfrek.

“I’m so sorry” repeated Simon for the hundred times.

“Yeah, stop with that, mate. We got the message, and you’re getting annoying” Spike said.

“Ok…Sor…I mean, good-bye. Halfrek, I’ll wait for you outside.”

Once he was out, Spike asked incredulously:

“Are you sure you want to give a second chance to that wanker ?”

“I’m not sure yet…I’ll talk to him. See if he truly regrets it.”

“I think I heard him say he’s sorry.” Buffy said, smiling.

“Well…I can say thank you again but then I’ll get as annoying as him, so…”

“Come back anytime” Buffy said, hugging her. “And thank you” she added for her ears only.

Halfrek turned to Spike.

“Bye, William. Take care of you.”

“Bye Cecily. It was good to see you again.”

She left. Buffy closed the door.

“Well…another entertaining evening in Sunnydale.”

Spike smiled.

“I’ll go check on Dawn.”

“Ok. I think I deserve a good shower.”

They went upstairs, Spike opened Dawn’s door.

“Nibblet ? Are you sleeping ?”

“No…you can come in, Spike.”

He let the door open, sat on her bed.

“How are you feeling ?”

“I should ask you. You were the one with the big migraine.”

“Oh, it’s almost over.”

“You saved my life” she said softly, taking his hand.

He shrugged, hiding his embarrassment.

“Not really…his gun was not loaded.”

“But you didn’t know that. So for me it’s the same.”

Moved, he brought her hand to his mouth and kissed it.

“I love you” she said in a sleepy voice.

“I love you too, little bit. I’ll always be there for you. Always.”

“I know. Will you sing me something ?”

Spike chuckled.

“What ?”

“Buffy told me once you had a great voice. Do you mind singing me something ?”

“I don’t know anything from those wankers you like…N’Sync or something…”

She laughed.

“That’s ok…Sing something you like…”

“Ok.”

He started to sing softly, not knowing Buffy was at the door, listening.

In the darkness…I can see your light…And you will always shine, and I can feel you heart in mine…Your face I’ve memorized, I idolised just you…

She slowly approached him, placing her hand gently on the back of his neck. When he was done, she smiled to him, tears in her eyes.

“This song is beautiful…You should really think to go onstage.” She said, half-kidding only.

“Right…Ladies and Gentleman, please welcome Spike and the Sunshine Band…No, wait…Spike Bon Jovi…AeroSpike…”

“Linkin Spike” she said, laughing.

“You guys are incredibly silly” said a voice coming from under the cover.

“Oops…we are disturbing the little sis…Goodnight, Dawn.”

“ ‘Night.”

Buffy closed the door.

She turned to him.

“The bathroom is free, if you want to…”

The minute after, she was in his arms and they were kissing passionately. He lifted her and bring her in her room, closed the door with his foot without breaking the kiss.

He gently placed her on the bed, took out his shirt.

She caressed her toned muscles.

“You won’t leave me ? Promise me you won’t.”

He kissed her, very tenderly this time.

“I promise.”

She sighed.

“I love you Spike. I’m sorry I’ve been so blind and stupid…”

He untied her bathrobe, pulling the sides apart, discovering her naked body.

“My God, Buffy…I love you so much…I missed you…” he whispered, wandering his mouth on her breasts.

“ Me or what I do to you ?” she asked with a seductive smile, directing her hand to his belt.

“Both…but mostly you”

He gave her another deep kiss that caught her breath. Soon they were both totally naked. Once again, Spike was doing magic with his fingers. And Buffy’s rising moans of pleasure were his biggest rewards.

“Spike…please…I want you inside me…now”

Without further delay, he positioned himself and entered her with excruciating slowness. When he started to move, she naturally caught his rhythm, concluding the dance they had initiated so many years ago.

Epilogue

A week later, they were all at the Bronze, including Dawn and her friends.

Xander was not very happy at first about the turns of events between Buffy and Spike, but he could see how much Buffy was happy, like she hadn’t been in a very long time.

For the moment she was comfortably resting between Spike’s strong arms, enjoying an evening with her friends. A moment later, Spike disentangled from her.

“There’s something I have to do. I’ll be back.”

He kissed her and left. Intrigued, she wondered what he had in mind. The light suddenly dimmed and a spot was directed on the stage. One of the owner appeared.

“Hello everyone…tonight we will have a special and unique performance…please enjoy.”

He left and Spike appeared. He tested the micro and waited for the music to start.

Willow leaned to Buffy.

“Did you know about this ?”

“No…”Buffy said, amazed.

Spike started to sing, and Buffy recognize the song he had sang to Dawn before.

In the Darkness….I can see your light…and you will always shine, and I can feel your heart in mine…your face I’ve memorized, I idolized just you…

I look up to everything you are…In my eyes you’ll do no wrong…I’ve loved you for so long, and after all was said and done…You’re still you…after all…You’re still you…

You walk past me…I can feel your pain…Time changes everything, one truth always stays the same…You’re still you…after all… you’re still you…

“That’s incredibly cheesy” Xander said.

“Shut up, Xander. It’s not cheesy. It’s romantic. You never sang to me like that.”

“Yes I did. We both did. About skeezy cheeses and hairy toes, remember ? That was so scary I vowed never to song a single word anymore. Ever.”

Buffy didn’t hear them, she was totally lost in Spike’s song.

And in this cruel and lonely world…I find one love…You’re still you…after all…you’re still you…

Everybody cheered him and applauded when he was done. He just said “Thank you” and left the stage, going back to the Scoobies.

Buffy welcomed him with stars in her eyes.

“I can’t believe you did this” she said with wonder.

“You’re worth it. And it was your idea, me on stage.”

“A pretty good idea.”

“Great performance, ‘young man’ !” Xander said, but he was sincere.

Spike took Buffy against him. She smiled to him.

“When everybody applauded…You blushed.”

He made an offended look.

“I told you already…I’m evil ! Evil don’t blush.”

“Well, you’re the kind of evil that does.”

She kissed him deeply, attracting look of envy from other girls, especially Dawn’s friends.

“ Your fan-club is watching us” she told him.

He smirked.

“Do you think they want an autograph ?”

“They certainly want much more from you than that.”

“Well, all the rest is reserved for you, luv.”

She rested her head on her shoulder.

“ That was really romantic. And way better than ‘Let me rest in peace’”

“Which was a vain plea anyway.”

He kissed her on the most sensitive spot on her neck. She shivered.

“What about you and I go home, now ?” he whispered with a voice full of promises.

“I hope you have bad intentions only…”

He made a devilish grin.

“You know me, baby…I’ve always been bad..”

FIN – THE END