Home : Stories by Author : Stories by Elsa Frohman : Met Its Match
Summary: First Evil meets
the being it can't crack. I admit it, I was inspired by Harmonious!
AUTHOR: Elsa Frohman
EMAIL: elsa@frohman.net
RATING: PG
PAIRING: Buffy/Spike
SPOILERS: None... really... I'm just being silly.
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Harmony looked in the window at the Gap. There was a pair of jeans with sparkly studs and a really, really nice purse -- not to mention a totally bitching pair of sandals.
She didn't have any money, but that wasn't going to be a problem. All she had to do was wait around until nearly closing time, then feed on the girl whose job it was to close up -- she could help herself to anything she wanted.
That wasn't the problem. The problem was that it was only seven o'clock, and the mall didn't close until nine. She had to amuse herself for two whole hours. That was just totally lame. Why couldn't they close earlier?
She turned, thinking to go down to the movie theater and see whether that movie about the World Trade Center was still playing, only to come face to face with Buffy Summers.
"Doing some shopping, Harm?"
The clearly overconfident Slayer gave her a knowing smile.
"Well, duh... of course I'm doing some shopping. Just because I'm dead doesn't mean I can't go shopping. Who died and made you queen? I'll shop if I want to."
Harmony backed away slowly as she spoke. It never hurt to put some distance between yourself and the Slayer.
"Didn't say you couldn't. Cool jeans. You really like that purse though?"
Harmony frowned. Something wasn't right here. The Slayer pulled out a stake and went for your heart. She didn't make chit chat about shopping.
"Um... no... the purse is like totally lame. I just like the jeans."
Buffy shrugged. "Yeah, the jeans are good. You going to get them?"
Ah-ha! That was it. The Slayer was trying to trick her.
"No... don't think so. Not today." She backed off a couple of more steps.
"Oh, don't be that way. You can have them! Just go in and get them. Who's going to stop you?"
"Um... you?"
"Me?" Buffy said, looking totally surprised. "Why would I stop you? I think you should have those jeans. Go on it. Kill the clerk. She won't put up much fight. Maybe I'll pick up a couple of pairs too."
"OK, I know what you're up to. You can't put anything over on me. I'm not falling for it. So just go back to your Do-Bee friends and leave me alone. I'm not killing anybody!"
"Do-Bee?"
"Isn't that what you call yourselves?"
Buffy cocked her head to the side and looked puzzled.
"Shoo, shoo... go away. You're not staking this little vamp today."
Harmony turned and started to walk away.
"Wait!"
The voice was different -- well, duh -- a lot different.
"Spike?"
"Yeah, baby. I missed you. Let's go back and do that clerk. Then my little princess can have all the glad rags she wants."
"You bastard! How dare you? You dumped me for Dorkzilla!"
"Aww, baby. That was then; this is now. I can't get by without my sweet Harmony."
Harmony looked him up and down. Spike was just as yummy has he'd ever been. That beautiful blond hair. Those nicely defined pecs. Those washboard abs. How could she resist...
"Awww... Boo-boo..." she said, her heart melting.
"There, there, baby. Let's just go back and do some shopping..." He gave her an evil grin.
"Wait a minute, buster. No way. I'm empowered. I don't need a boyfriend to be the best me I can be."
"What?"
"You heard me. You'll just take me back and use me, and then as soon as Dumzilla or the Slayer crooks a finger, you'll drop me like yesterday's scrambled eggs! No way. I don't need you."
She turned and started to flounce off again.
"Yesterday's scrambled eggs?" Spike said, looking distinctly puzzled.
Harmony drew up short. Drusilla was standing directly in her path.
"You could never hold on to him, could you? You're just not bad enough."
"I'm bad. I'm bad as I need to be. I'm empowered," Harmony said with a frown.
"He'll never think you're anybody unless you start acting like somebody. Go back and kill the clerk."
"Oh, no. Not 'cause you say so."
Harmony started off again, and was startled when she walked right through Drusilla.
"Whoa... that was sort of cool..."
She turned around, but the dark haired vampire was gone.
Harmony shrugged. "Bitch," she muttered.
She took another step only to find a nearly indescribably monster rearing up in front of her. It roared with open jaws lined by rows of teeth dripping with blood and saliva.
"Go back and kill the clerk!" it screamed.
Harmony put her hands on her hips.
"Somebody's a cranky baby!"
The monster melted away.
"Humph!" she said. "Try and tell me what to do..."
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Elsa Frohman - elsa@frohman.net